50 Crates of Grey

 

 

Mister and I were recently at the home of friends. Their garage is a thing of beauty. It’s incredibly well-organized and each time I see it, I am overcome with healthy jealousy. I look at all their efforts toward order and I imagine the same in my garage. I visualize open space and the comfort of knowing exactly where to look for things. And then I remember what our garage actually looks like and I force my brain-hole to focus on something else, lest I resort to tears. But my friends’ garage – that’s a different story.

 

Anyhoo – as Mister and I marveled at said friends’ garage, Mister said something about how the crates’ labels could be something from Fifty Shades of Grey. (He said that, but neither of us has read the books or seen the movie.) “Utensils.” “Straps & Hooks.” “Tape/Glue.” “Rope.” Sure – those are easy. But it takes a truly warped mind to utilize “Arts & Crafts,” or “Sticker Rolls.” Perhaps even “Deep Sea” or “Bowls” could store sex objects.

 

Again, I didn’t read the books or see the movie, so I don’t know. But at least I know where to look, should a friend need a few props. Ahem…

50 Shades of Gross

 

 

Mister told me of a recent study (as written about here), where Belgian professors ran tests on commonly checked-out library books, including Fifty Shades of Grey. Their findings were unsettling and disturbing: trace amounts of cocaine and the herpes virus.

 

Being a wee bit of a germaphobe, this naturally led me to wonder if I should ever darken the doorstep of the public li-berry again. (The court is still out on this one.)

 

My next thought, friends, was to wonder what the heck people be doing with that Fifty Shades of Grey book. And where do they be rubbing it?

 

I haven’t read those books (and won’t), but it sounds more like 50 shades of gross to me. Yuck!